Hellhole
Around last week, after a long time, I got to stand at attention to the Philippine national anthem before seeing Batman begins. While 'Lupang Hinirang' was playing, it got me thinking about what was I really feeling about the national situation...
'Bayang magiliw, perlas ng silanganan...
Damn. I cannot, even with all the imaginative strength I can muster, picture our country as a bright shining pearl.
There's just so much dirt and decay around that I can't even call it a country. Because of the level of corruption now it's just become so stupid. And because it's so stupid, it's actually amazing. Amazing that our leaders selfishly participate in various scams aimed only at self interest. Amazing how they take the rest of the country for fools. Amazing that we wake up each day and see a little bit of the Philippines crumble into the sea, along with our dreams and aspirations, and still choose to wake up the next day and do the same thing again.
Amazing how the government can still sleep at night.
I don't want to say I hate this country, but sometimes, sometimes... has patriotism gone dead? Is self-interest the only thing worth living for these days? Sure you have to eat, sure it's okay to aspire to be rich, but through dishonest means? There are times, when I have felt the blunt blow of awareness or the sharp stabbing pains of social and national conscience, that I actually wish for a bloody revolution.
A cleansing if you will.
But those are my emotions speaking. My logic frequently butts in, reminding me that I am not living in a nation where civil war is a way of life, and that I should just shut up and find alternate means to better myself and my country. But that raises another question.
Why doesn't civil war happen?
Obviously, the answer lies in this country's inhabitants. See here, if someone were to plot against the government, would you join? Would I join? Shamefully, I probably would not. I would probably still want due process and prosecution through the law and all that blah-blah. But why?
Asking myself that question brought to mind images of the carabao. The national beast of burden. The image of anything and everything Filipino. The carabao. Whoever picked the carabao probably could identify it with the filipino. A beast of burden. Born to carry the yoke and to plow the field all day long. Content with munching grass at the end of the day. Too timid to even complain about the driver repeatedly flogging his(or her) backside.
Are we carabaos?
Are we content with only the grass given to us after all the hardship we've endured? And how long must we tolerate the whip repeatedly striking our side? Must we plow the field all day long, everyday, every week, for the rest of our lives? It looks a lot like hell to me. Well, minus the grass.
Going back to the bloody revolution, can it happen?
Honestly, I don't think so. It's either we're too apathetic, too self-indulgent, too dumb, or a combination of all three. When will true change come? Not just change of government or leadership, but change in thinking. Change in social norms and in awareness of social responsibility.
...hay naku...
Another day has passed. And in a few hours the metropolis will once again come alive, churning and chugging, slowly grinding itself deeper still into the ground. Life as we know it will go on, so will corruption and greed. The kotong cops will still be on the corner of EDSA and New York, the Quiapo snatchers will still be sitting at the food stall across the street waiting patiently for you to drop your guard...
...but there will always be hope. Hopes of better and brighter futures. Hope. It is, and has been the food of us Filipinos. It has been with us for centuries, and will probably stay for more. Yes, hope will always be here.
Let us just hope that all this hoping can eventually translate into something tangible, before we burn up in this hellhole.
posted by Karl @ 1:41 AM
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